A Masochistic Mess
by HotpantsHeather
Summary: The Vatican Section XIII attempts to make a monster of their own to combat Alucard and end up with a bit of an accident, namely Dracula. Hmm... What say you? AlucardxIntegra DraculaxIntegra.
1. Chapter 1

Hello everyone! This is the first chapter of a fic that was requested by a very sweet Romina Paula Rossi. I hope that you like it! :D This is a bit out of my usual element so I hope that my other readers enjoy this too. Everyone let me know what you think!

Disclaimer- Don't own anything.

* * *

The Vatican Section XIII housed a very lethal secret within it's walls. It was only mentioned on the lips of a few, never spoken of outside of the rooms with books to the ceiling. The man who had been in charge of Section XIII had been the organizer of such a monstrosity. It had all been taboo, a mess. There had been rules broken and laws formed because of what had taken place in the basement of that building on the edge of a little town in England.

Arch- Bishop Linus found that combating the Vampire Alucard was possibly the biggest problem that the Vatican had to deal with. Now though, they would have something to use against him. They would have a match to use against the Vampire Alucard.

The man had drawn a circle on the floor of the shack. He had lit candles and said words. Words that were sacrilegious. Words that would have him put to death. The Vatican would thank him for these words if what he was doing turned out just perfect. Just right. A combination of dirt and metal. A combination of Alchemy and magic. A mixture of mistakes.

He spoke the words and watched the circle as it realized it's command and everything was going as planned.

Until.

Until, the door came down on Linus' shack and the tall lean figure of Enrico Maxwell stood before him, flanked by his two women. Heinkel and Yumie. The older man stood carefully and looked at his underling.

"Maxwell," he began and the other smiled, loving the sound of fear in his name as it was spoken.

"Heretic!" Enrico snarled and looked past the other man and what he saw made eyes go wide. This was not what he was expecting. What was this monster? "K-kill him."

At these words Heinkel smirked and forced the Arch-Bishop to his knees. Yumie unsheathed her sword. Enrico passed them by, going to the edge of the circle, looking in as if he was looking at an animal in a cage.

"Maxwell," the other man said and Enrico turned his attention to the older man. "You haven't beheld the monster. The Hellsing Monster. It was a monster before monsters were even thought of. He was a creature of night in the eighteen hundreds. He's lived since the fifteenth century. Unnaturally. Nothing can beat him. Nothing…but himself."

"You're insane…" Enrico insisted and turned his attention back to what was happening in the circle. Where now, the full form of a man had appeared. Enrico set his jaw and turned back to the three. "Kill him, now," he told Yumie and she did.

In one swift motion the man's head had been severed from his body. What remained of the Arch-Bishop fell unceremoniously to the floor of the dank and dirty room.

Outside of a small town in England.

Where it was not allowed for the Vatican to be doing much of anything. The Hellsing organization was well on it's way to stop the mess that was being made. This country of England was not one to allow such messes to be made. Integra Wingates Hellsing was going to make sure of that. She rode steadily on the way to the shack that Linus had once occupied. Her and her pet, Alucard and her butler, Walter. Along with them came a team of men that would help clean up any messes that would be left behind.

The mess that would be there when they arrived was what Linus had left behind and what Enrico was going to try and dispose of himself.

"Hellsing will be here soon," Enrico said as he headed toward the door. "Kill that… thing," he told the girls and they looked at it carefully. The man that Linus had made. Who was he to act as God?

Heinkel raised her gun as Enrico went to the car they had come in. He opened the door and begun to step in when he saw the Hellsing car.

Enrico frowned and mumbled a curse under his breath. "Heinkel! Yumie! Forget it! Hellsing is here!" The two girls rushed out and climbed into the car after Enrico and then, it sped away.

Before the Hellsing car had even stopped Integra was out and pointing her weapon at the black car speeding away from them. As they moved out of sight Integra lowered her gun and looked at the door of the shack, swinging in the wind.

"Shit," she mumbled and without warning Alucard was behind her. She turned and walked into him.

"Problem, Master?" he asked the young woman before him. Integra was nineteen and still overworked. Even at nineteen she was ready and willing to run headfirst into battle with the enemy. She turned to the vampire.

"They got away," she told him.

The Vampire shrugged with a smirk and then looked at the shack as the door banged once more on the side of the building from the wind. He frowned at it. Something felt wrong. The vampire took a step toward the building and when Integra tried to follow, he stopped her.

Integra frowned and he glared at her.

"Fine. I'll wait here," she told him and he approached the building. When he entered he beheld the sight of the beheaded Section XIII leader and the drawn circle. The smell of sulfur was in the air. The Vampire drew his gun. The slightest movement would send him into a frenzy of firing. He would shoot to kill anything that he saw, gladly.

Then, movement.

Alucard turned, almost in slow motion, and found his target. The lean figure of a man, naked. The long dark hair that he was so used to. The mirror image of a face that he once knew.

Alucard stared at the form of the man.

Himself.

Dracula.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter two for you all. Enjoy!

Disclaimer: I don't own anything.

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Integra and Walter stood quietly out side of the shack on the edge of town. The wind kicked up and the shack seemed to creak in protest of mother nature. Integra shivered, completely unawares of what was happening inside the building. There were no sounds, which lead them to believe no ghouls or vampires. No pests to deal with. Yet, Alucard had not come out yet. Integra fidgeted.

Within the confines of the dark shack Alucard had drawn his weapon. He pointed it at the man before him.

"What sort of trick is this?" He asked and smirked.

The man before him looked confused. He touched his head and closed his eyes.

"What?" he said in Romanian.

Alucard was not amused. He shoved the gun into the man's head. He snarled at him. This was a clever trick. He wondered what the Vatican was getting into while Alucard was distracted by this mess.

"Give it up," Alucard snarled in Romanian. The old language fell clumsily from his lips. He hadn't spoken like that in a century. More.

"What do you speak of, broth-" the other one had begun before Alucard lost his short patience. He pulled the trigger on his gun, sending a bullet into the shoulder of the man kneeling before him.

Outside, Integra and Walter heard Alucard scream. Within moments the girl had drawn her sword and was rushing into the building. Walter shouted for her to stop but she ignored him and went into the shack anyway.

"Alucard!" she shouted and finally say him standing over the pale form of…someone.

"Thick headed girl," Alucard said and walked around the man writhing in pain on the floor. "I told you to wait outside."

"Alucard! Is that a human?" she stepped toward him.

"No. It's a mess. Someone's idea of humor. Something made of metals and sands. A clay pot filled with blood," the vampire held his gun up to shoot the man again.

"Stand down!" Integra ordered and the vampire glared at her. "That's an order, Alucard. Stand down." The man was shouting something angry and vengeful in Alucard's direction now. He turned his face to Integra's shouting and she froze. "Who… is he?"

"No one of consequence. Allow me to make him disappear," Alucard said.

"Fucking STAND DOWN!" Integra ordered and the vampire snarled at her, going to stand between her and the man shouting in Romanian on the floor. Integra put her sword under his chin. "Now, why does this man look so much like you?"

Alucard smiled his wolfish smile and began laughing, then cackling. "Oh, because my Master, because he is me."

Integra remained quiet and only looked past her pet to the man on the floor cradling his wounded shoulder. She sheathed her sword and pushed Alucard out of the way, going to the man. "Alucard, fetch Walter."

"Master," the vampire began, still laughing.

"Alucard! We do not kill unarmed men. You should have consulted me for orders on how to deal with this man," she scolded and Alucard frowned at her. "Now, fetch Walter."

Alucard snarled and turned to get the butler but found him already within the shack. He had followed Integra in directly after the scream. He had been there the entire time. "I'm here, Sir."

"Walter, get something for him to wear. Alucard, can you speak to him?"

Alucard turned and looked at his master, stoically. "Yes…Master."

"Tell him we're going to help."

Alucard did so and the man on the floor spat something in Alucard's direction.

"What did he say?"

"A nasty thing…nothing for you to hear," Alucard smirked at his master and then at the man on the floor.

A mess, if anything.

Disgusting.

* * *

In the Vatican Enrico Maxwell was being appointed leader of Section XIII. He was humbled, or at least managed to look it. The Pope congratulated him on his promotion and he only nodded in a 'think nothing of it' sort of way.

"And Linus' things were taken care of?"

"His things, your grace?"

"That mess he made?" The Pope explained. "The magic he was dabbling in? I assume you took care of anything he made a mess of?"

"We disposed of Linus, but the Hellsing Organization showed up and we had to flee. I don't think there was anything left behind," Enrico assured the Pope. He was of course, lying through his teeth. Surely Hellsing had enough brains to destroy something like that.

They couldn't be that stupid.

* * *

"Ask him what his name is," Integra commanded Alucard.

Walter was digging the bullet from Alucard's gun out of the man's shoulder.

"I don't have to ask him, Master. It's Dracula."

"Don't be foolish and don't lie to me, Alucard."

"I am not, mistress. He is me. He is Dracula, or rather Vlad."

The man looked up at hearing his name and Integra looked him in the face. Alucard looked back, but it wasn't him. It was different.

"Well how is he you if you're right here?" Integra demanded.

"Magic, I suppose, my Master," the vampire said and cackled. Vlad shouted something at him in Romanian and Alucard shouted back. They both shouted and carried on like so until Integra shouted for them to shut up.

Vlad spoke something in Romanian to Alucard, who snarled in response.

"What did he say?" Integra asked.

"He said that you were pretty. He won't make that mistake again!" Alucard insisted and Integra rolled her eyes.

"Oh, Alucard," she smirked. "If he thinks that you must think it too, being the same man and all." Integra told him with hands on her hips. She smirked a satisfied smirk.

Alucard smirked back at his master. "At this age, I was very foolish."

"Got the bullet!" Walter said and Vlad howled with pain.


	3. Chapter 3

Integra stood in her office. She wrung her hands carefully as Walter spoke.

"There is no way to tell what exactly he is. He seems to be human, but how he ended up here seems to be a mystery," Walter turned and gestured to the Alucard look alike in the chair in the corner. He was wearing a suit and fidgeted uncomfortably in it. Alucard stood next to him, ready to translate at any moment.

"This is ridiculous. There is no way to bring someone from the past.," Integra insisted and turned around to look at Vlad. Walter turned and looked at the two men as well. Alucard smirked.

"Ah, but the magic that binds me to the Hellsing Family is completely impossible then? I think not. Dabbling in magic has happened since man could even fathom such things. This magic is not uncommon."

"This is a bit different than tying you to us, Alucard," Integra said and took a step toward the vampire. Her heels clicked quietly on the tiled floor. She stopped and looked down at Vlad. "No, this is not turning metal to gold."

Vlad leaned on his hand and smiled up at Integra. Alucard hit him and snarled something in Romanian to him. They fought.

"ENOUGH!" Integra shouted. "Walter, get a tutor in her as soon as possible. I want him to know English as soon as we can manage. By the month if we can."

"Not everyone is as skilled a linguist as yourself ma'am," Walter said carefully.

"I'll work on learning Romanian as well, Walter," she smiled at her butler and nodded. "We also need to arrange a meeting with one of the section XIII higher ups. They will not leave us to clean up their little mess," she lit a cigar carefully. "Also, get Vlad a room. Alucard will be along shortly to help translate for you."

"Right away ma'am," Walter said and left the room, taking Vlad with him.

Alucard approached his master.

"We need to go back to that shack. We need to see what he was trying to accomplish with this. Why you? Why now?"

"Perhaps they were trying to make another me. Another vampire?"

"That's ridiculous," Integra scoffed and turned to look at her pet. He smirked. "Why do you dislike him so?"

Alucard frowned then, clearly annoyed with her question. The very thought of his younger self seemed to put him in a bad mood. "A foolish child. He has not yet discovered what he is. He does not know what is to come."

"Is he from the past?"

"Yes."

"Then what is to come of you?"

* * *

Within two months Vlad was beginning to speak English. He only could mutter various phrases and words, stringing them together almost clumsily, but he had learned quick nonetheless. Integra was impressed and told him so as they sat in the sun drinking tea. As Vlad had learned English Integra had also found the time to learn enough Romanian to hold a decent conversation.

"You've learned very well."

"Ah," he said and shrugged.

"You're taking this all very well," Integra said and sipped her tea carefully. She looked at him over her cup. At any time she was ready for him if he turned out to be a spy.

He blinked at her a moment, looking at Integra.

"Is this better?" Integra asked in Romanian.

"Much," he replied in his mother tongue. "I was very confused at first but Alucard explained to me that something had gone very terribly wrong. He said that I wasn't supposed to be here and that I would be sent home soon."

"I see," Integra took a drink of her tea.

"I have not a problem with it, you see," he said and took a drink of his own tea carefully. "For you're a very beautiful woman."

Integra did not falter. She only smiled slightly at her companion. He fidgeted in his suit again and she found it very hard to take him seriously.

"Work on your English. Perhaps then we can talk," Integra smiled and stood up from her seat and as she entered the mansion again Alucard appeared beside her.

"What did you talk about?"

"What is the worry, Alucard? Are you jealous?"

Alucard looked out at his younger self.

"I already told you: I was very foolish at that age. Very…" he searched for the word, finally leaning in close to his master. "…hungry."

Integra rose an eyebrow at him. "I can handle myself, thank you very much, vampire."

"I am only warning you."

"I have a meeting with the twelve. After we are going back to that shack to investigate. You are to behave yourself. No fighting with Vlad, am I clear?"

"As crystal."

"Good," Integra said and made her way up the staircase to the meeting with the twelve. Islands eyed her carefully as she took her seat.

"We have new business?" Islands said and all the men turned to look at Integra. "You are housing some sort of creature in your home are you not?"

"Yes. He is some sort of carbon copy of the vampire…but in human form. He seems to be a younger version of our Alucard. Alucard seems to think that he was summoned from his time to ours. In which case my only worry is possible time paradox?"

"Time paradox?" one of the twelve cried indignantly.

"Recall H.G. Wells' _The Time Machine_," Integra insisted. "Such time paradox are not unheard of, albeit in novels."

"Sir Integra, the premise of H.G. Wells is quite different," Islands insisted.

"So it is, but the idea is quite the same. If Vlad Tepes is here…then who is in the fifteenth century? And even more importantly, who is responsible for such as this to happen? We found Section XIII leader, Linus Bianchi, was found decapitated and a Section XIII care was fleeing the scene. I can only imagine what was going on before we arrived."

"What do you propose?" Islands inquired of her.

"A meeting with a Vatican higher up and a thorough investigation of the shack where the Tepes man was found."

"It had better yield results, Integra," Islands told her and she set her jaw.

"I believe it will."

* * *

Integra slammed the phone down on her desk.

"That slimy roman bastard!"

"Problem, master?" Alucard inquired sitting on the edge of his master's desk.

"The Section XIII leader won't speak to me. They tell me to call when something more pressing arrives and they deny any knowledge of Linus or what he had done."

"Then I suppose we are stuck with me," Alucard said and Integra looked up at him. He was frowning.

"We'll investigate the shack. We may be able to find some scriptures to help us in there," Integra grumbled to her pet. "In the meantime we will simply live with him. He's not at all bad."

"You have yet to read any of the stories," Alucard smirked. He went around the desk to his master and took her hair in his hand, carefully. Integra looked at him sideways. "I murdered my pregnant mistress. Sliced her open from navel to nose."

Integra swatted his hand from her hair. "Come off it," she told him and stood. "I'll work in my room. You are not to disturb me, clear?"

"Yes, mistress," Alucard bowed.

"You are not funny."

* * *

I know that a person cannot learn a language as fast as a couple of months. We'll just pretend that Vlad Dracula is incredible at learning. Integra on the other hand, I could see her being really apt as a linguist knowing German French and Italian. Possibly even something exotic like Japanese (As an englishwoman that is, not as a Japanese anime character .)... I'm rambling. Don't forget to review.

Disclaimer: I own nothing.


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